Squat Plays Games
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Leviathan Wakes Review: Waking the Leviathan Within My Pants
I LOVED THIS BOOOOOOOOOK Space opera meets neo-noir detective story, with a generous helping of dope space-marine shit. Leviathan Wakes is a fun little space opera that follows the crew of the Rocinante, a “salvaged” interplanetary frigate of Martian design, as they navigate the politics of a fully settled solar system and work to uncover…
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I Got a Nintendo Switch Pro Controller Early! (Shh…It’s a Secret)
So, as you guys know, today is my birthday (thank you), and look what I was able to snag before the official release (my dad owns Nintendo, remember?): the Nintendo Switch Pro Controller. Now, guys, don’t tell anyone I have this, or my dad will take away all of your games and make sure you…
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My Time With Elden Ring
You’ve finally done it–you’ve made a friend. Elden Ring came into your life at just the right time: your passing acquittances with those other games felt so shallow and meaningless, your conversations so dull and lacking; you longed for uninhibited connection. You heard rumblings about the new guy and his popularity. Your coworkers were enamored,…
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Final Fantasy Adventure Review: Seiken Densetsu Zelda’s Boring Adventure
Like Link’s Awakening, But Worse Final Fantasy Adventure, also known as Seiken Densetsu in Japan and Mystic Quest in Europe, saw its initial Japanese release on June 28, 1991 for the original Game Boy. The NA version soon followed on November 1st of that same year (no one cares about Europe), and it was by…
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Magazine Memories Ep.1
Never tilt your head back to look directly at the old cardboard box you’re pulling down from that long-forgotten basement shelf. You know what I’m talking about: the tears, the dusty boogers, the chalky coarseness covering your throat and smothering your alveoli. I learned that lesson for the thousandth time just the other week. That…
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Nintendo Switch OLED Review
Hey guys, check out what my NintenDAD brought me: an OLED Nintendo Switch (owning Nintendo has its perks). He’s been staying at a hotel in the city for the last few weeks (work stuff. He’s always so busy at Nintendo), but today he came home to bring me this! Mom said I have meet Dad…